Stranger Anxiety

Object permanence.  That's when a baby realizes that just because something isn't visible doesn't mean it doesn't exist.  This awareness typically develops around six months.  Or in Clara's case, five and a half.  It is often accompanied by varying degrees of stranger anxiety.  Babies realize that there are options for upon whom they must rely.

I've been thinking about this a lot after seeing Clara FREAK OUT last night when I briefly left the room two different times.  She was so upset!  After the first incident, I wasn't convinced it was due to my leaving, as it had never happened before.  The second time it was clear.  Poor Crystal and Ryan!  They tried to warn me.


Here are my reactions:
1. Stranger anxiety is ...anxiety.  I don't like the idea of my five month old baby feeling intense anxiety like this.
2. This could actually be a good thing in the unlikely case that a stranger with bad intentions ever tried to approach her.  It's a baby alarm.
3. This is going to make it much more difficult to utilize childcare.
4. I think being overly tired contributed to her "episode."
5. I feel really sad for putting her in a situation where she felt that unsafe.  She was sobbing and shaking after my first exit.  I picked her up to comfort her, and because this was during bath time and she was diaper-less, after calming down and relaxing... let's just say I got a little extra wet.  This was the cause of my second (misjudged) exit of the evening.
6. I hope this doesn't hurt anyone's feelings in the future.  Ryan and Crystal don't mind, but it is kind of awkward as a general rule.
7. I'm a bit humbled.  As with most things in parenting, I thought I could take steps to ensure this would never be an issue.  I now realize, again, that I really can't control this baby.
8. It's slightly cool that she is displaying signs of attachment to me.

Mitch points out that this is not a trend until it happens on three occasions, so saying, "Clara has stranger anxiety" is not a sufficiently evidence-based claim.
I agree that's true, and hopefully it will be an isolated event.  I want Clara to feel safe and secure and happy and nothing less!

15 Things that Change When You Have a Baby

These are from a Baby-Center article. I "edited" the list down to the ones that most resonated with me.  I thought some of them were pretty true.

1. You look at your baby in the mirror instead of yourself.
2. You realize more that true joy doesn't come from material wealth.
3. You'd rather buy a plastic tricycle than those shoes that you've been dying to have.
4. You no longer rely on a clock — your baby now sets your schedule.
5. You learn that taking a shower is a luxury.
6. You just plain love life more
7. You become a morning person.
8. You can have the most wonderful conversation using only vowel sounds like "ahhh" and "oooo."
9. You finally stop to smell the roses, because your baby is in your arms.
10. You respect your parents and love them in a new way.
11. You find that your baby's pain feels much worse than your own.
12. You think of someone else 234,836,178,976 times a day.
13. Bodily functions are no longer repulsive.
14. You discover how much there is to say about one tooth
15. Your heart expands to hold a lot more love, a superhuman [God-given] power.

Baby

I've noticed that when I'm talking to Clara, I tend to address her as Baby instead of by her name or another endearment.  And when I say 'baby,' I say it with great relish.  I've reflected on this, and discovered that I love saying it because I love that she is a ...baby.  That word means "little, scoop-up-able, hugable, cuddly, ticklish, smiley, wonderful, sweet, soft-templed, and good-smelling."  Baby is a great word!  I enjoy her baby-ness so much.

A baby is a warm little human person, comprised of a beating heart, little fingers, toes, sneezes, yawns, laughter, hiccups, and wiggles.  A baby is CUTE.  And despite her lack of fully developed coordination and language... she has so much personality.  And what's more, I only have six more months before my baby's not really a baby anymore, so I may as well soak it in as much as I possibly can.  Baby is a great word.

My 'baby' and I took advantage of the first cool day to wear our matching leggings.

I Love My Lips

This is Clara's newest thing.  She loves making noises with her spit and lips.  It gets Mitch every time.  We both think this is extremely funny.  Just imagine, you're driving down the road trying to have a conversation, and this is what you hear randomly coming from the back seat.  You'd be laughing too.  And then you'd take some videos.

This little collection took no time at all to accumulate considering Clara does this ALL THE TIME.

Click here to see them.

My favorites are at the end.

Clara At 5 Months

Weight: 18.5 lbs (unofficially)

Length:  26.5" (unofficially)

What she can do: She can sit up by herself (in a momentary, wobbly kind of way, not for real), roll both directions, sit in a high chair, hold toys and rattle them around or chew on them, eat from a spoon (I'm assuming a certain percentage of her food must get down her throat...right?), turn in the direction of a sound, and track her eyes side-to-side and up-and-down (supposedly the latter is an advanced skill.  Go Clara! :).  She is exploring everything more all the time.  Today I held her in my lap as a ate an omelet.  She watched me scoop up a bite, then craned her neck to follow its path all the way up and behind her to my mouth.  She was riveted, watching bite after bite, perhaps making connections about eating or at least the spacial concept that moving objects don't just disappear, they go somewhere.

What she likes:  Laughing, smiling, being talked to, socializing.  She likes to laugh at my antics: silly faces, invading her person space, funny voices, saying "you're beautiful" twenty times per day.  She laughs the hardest when I lay my head on her stomach/diaphragm area.  She also likes laughing at her dad's antics: singing silly songs "jump, jump, jump around", holding her upside down, zooming her through the air, flinging her over his head (typical dad stuff), saying "Burp it out," "Stop being a bear, Clara Bear," "It's OK" (there's a certain intonation that goes with this one), and "Are you just going to cry like a baby?" She likes holding her toes, especially during diaper changes, which isn't as helpful as it sounds.  She likes Veggie Tales songs, rattles, the cheesy, electronic-sounding music that comes pre-recorded in baby stuff, kicking around in her bath water and getting me all wet, kicking stuff in general, making slobber noises with her lips and tongue, taking loud breaths of air, and sitting in her big-girl stroller.


This is Clara making her spit noises. This morning I was holding her, smiling down at her and admiring how sweet she is when she gave me a beautiful smile in return, stuck her tongue out, and blew as hard as she could, spraying me in the face with slobber.

Sleep:  Inconsistent.  One night she sleeps no more than three hours in a row.  The next night, she sleeps 9 hours straight.  The next night six hours, then two smaller chunks of sleep.  After turning four months she made a huge digression in her sleeping, and we're still not quite back to our former glory.

Other information: We've abandoned headbands in favor of clip-in bows.  Clara's mobility allows her to get herself into too much trouble with headbands, specifically by pulling them down over her eyes or mouth.  She doesn't like it one bit, and doesn't yet know how to escape this particular predicament.  Also, she won't take a bottle, so she and I haven't been apart for more than three hours since she was six weeks old.  She has super-kissable cheeks.  I take advantage of my opportunities to kiss them every time I pick her up.  She thinks it's funny.  So cute.

Five Month Photos (by Mom)